Tonight we're hanging Left Coast style in Seattle and L.A. I'm not expecting much from L.A., being inundated with wannabe actors. Adam Shankman is the guest judge. He's so sexy that he makes me wish that I was a gay man.
Oooh, Comfort and Joshua are in the audience .... together? The cool tap dancer, Bianca is back again with straight, reddish hair. Don't know that I'm digging the hair, but she was a favorite of mine last year. She is phenomenal in an acapella tap routine that receives a standing ovation. She's a Vegas girl, of course.
Xavier and Burnell are siblings who apparently always hold hands strangers think that they're a couple - seriously, though, their vibe is umm, not familial. From the bits of practice we see in their introduction, they look a bit like a train wreck. They put on what might be a really, really bad Mia Michaels routine. Half way through I wonder if these moves are actually planned in advance. Alan starts using all this technical lingo in telling them they suck. They go home to spoon.
Our first really plus sized auditioner is Debra. When we first see her, it looks like she's on the floor after her knees finally gave out. At one point, Nigel thinks that she is finished, but no - she continues to run around the stage like she smells pizza and doesn't know where it's coming from. Nigel tells her that she's short and needs to choose moves that take that into account. She apparently is an orthodox Jew. She says that she'll have to decide whether she wants to continue in dance because her religion prohibits her from dancing in front of men - which of course she just did, as she is on national television.
Another montage of wacky dancers, including a "Fairy Medicine Dancer", whom Nigel asks what she is on. There's also a chubby Asian guy who goes around on his toes (or en pointe if you want to get fancy) a lot.
Next are swing dancer, Calico. I like swing dance and the fact that Calico is dressed like Rosie the Riveter. Nigel says that she's cool, but not professional enough. She takes the big "No" well. Adam says he'll dance with her and I'm overcome with jealousy. Adam is, of course, fabulous. Apparently, Katie is also in the audience and she, Lauren and Joshua critique him. Moving on.
Asian ballroom dancers Ricky and Asuka, which is apparently pronounced like "Oscar", are second time auditioners. Asuka was in Vegas last year, but I don't remember her. Ricky doesn't seem to have mastered the English language. Asuka has mastered the sexy, but not trashy thing. Their routine is fun and interesting. Asuka has more flair, but I love "I Like it Like That" (Korean disco movie), so I instantly love Ricky. They get through to Vegas. Looking forward to seeing them.
After another good dancer montage, we meet Nathan. He's a total hottie and I am a total pervert because I know from the previews that he's 17. Seriously. a hot, non-effeminate dancer? Holy crap. Adam seems to notice Nathan good looks too. He's an amazing fabulous dancer. In fact, he dances so powerfully that his pockets come out of his shorts. Sadly, my long lost love is too young to be eligible. Nigel gives his a post-dated ticket to the Fall season. I'll wait for you Nathan....
On to Day 2. Sammy is a red-haired former wrestler. Sammy needs new hair. He's a popper, which I like because I like last year's winner, Joshua. I may have been watching this show too long but I like his musicality. His facial expressions at times look like he's burping. Adam loves him, but is worried about whether he has other skills. Sammy has a thousand watt smile, by the way. To choreography.
Our next auditioner Stacy appears to be suffering from a grand mal seizure. She flails around the stage like me in the living room at the age of 10 after seeing "Flashdance." Adam doesn't love her and asks if she has any formal training. He tries to nicely tell her "Yuck." Back to the farm, Stacy. In her post interview, I feel bad because she's crying and seems like a very nice girl. You'll find your thing, darlin'.
Amanda's pre-interview totally gets to me because her father has MS and my father has Parkinson's and I feel what she's going through. She's pretty and blonde with an amazing figure. But can she dance? The answer in my opinion is yes. Nigel looks like a kid in a cupcake shop. Unanimous invitation to Vegas.
Philip the rubber man from last year who missed Vegas because of pneumonia. When the judge's see him warming up, they tell him to get off the stage and get his ticket. But he's not done because his girlfriend Ariel is auditioning too and he's dancing with her. There's a story about her mother and injuries and wheelchairs. Anyway, they dance and it's ok, but not SYTYCD level. I have the feeling that Ariel will be watching Philip audition in Vegas on TV. Lo and behold, she's going to Vegas. Good for you, Ariel.
We break from the good dancers to meet Kevin. I'm pretty sure that he's a get on TV contestant. He likens himself to Shakira and is a man wearing white jeans. If you are a man, unless you are Pierce Bronson, you are not allowed to wear white jeans. Kevin is the drunk guy in a bar who you kind of feel bad for because you know he's waking up with a monster hangover. He appears to be dancing with such zeal that his fly is descending.
We see a bit of choreography and I'm, of course, totally cheering my favorite Sammy on. Go Sammy! Smile a lot, the judges love that! He's going to Vegas. I wave my arms like an idiot. That's it, Sammy is tonight's favorite.
To Seattle - home of the Space Needle. They claim that this is their first time here, but I am suspicious because I think I remember it from last year. Guest judge = Mia Michaels. Mia is an acquired taste. When I first saw SYTYCD I had never heard of lyrical dance and I wondered who the chubby whack job flailing around was. Now I recognize her genius, but I still think she's odd and abrasive.
The first contestant is a super-Geek, Christopher, who claims to be dancing a swing-tango combination to some Star Trek Nine Inch Nails music. His partner is just there to accompany him. I do question the delusional vs. fame seeking. Mary practically wets her pants. Christopher explains his lack of performance and some sort of commentary on gender roles. Mia asks the question that I myself have asked "did you actually think this was good?" Christopher says he thinks it was "rough." He seems good natured, though, so I don't resent him wasting my time.
Nick is a tattoo artist who call himself McNasty and I'm pretty sure is only here to promote his tattooing. He turns out to be a decent breaker. Not the style of Hok or Dominic, but pleasant. He stops early because he tires out. Nick is really caustic from word go. I don't think that he realizes that the judge's think that he was good. Big mistake. He winds up turning everyone off. Bye, angry Nick.
Bad dancer Dmitrious does a lot of flailing handstands. Mary and Mia worry that he's going to injure himself and I'm right there with them. I get the impression that he's trying to commit suicide onstage without the assistance of any weapon. He's been breaking for 3 months and it shows. Nigel suggest that he try ballroom, but they won't be seeing him more today.
A bunch of bad dancers are highlighted by a fat man who dances with one hand in his pocket and a guy who does a belly flop. Seattle has crappy dancers, if this bit is any indication. Nigel is getting pissed.
Kelsea beats Sammy in the bad hair department. She is Asian and has black hair highlighted by gray bangs and a blue patch. If you can get past the hair, though, she does a great hard core lyrical routine. Nigel says that Sonja would adore her. She is totally unique. Kelsea is choreography bound.
In the choreography part, Kelsea doesn't impress me. She has a whole stick out your butt thing. They give her a ticket to Vegas based on her solo, though. Only 4 dancers get through on Day 1 Seattle.
Day 2 Seattle is warmer and hopefully will bring better dancers. A Hawaiian dancer with way to long of a name is up first and I think right away that Mia will love him. His nickname is Porno. Mia feels his vibe, though, and he's to choreography.
The good dancer review makes me wish they'd concentrated on other forms of dance besides contemporary and lyrical. More breaking and popping!
Long haired loser David Sex Stoller is back. Russian Leonid gives old David a run for his money in the hallucinating nutjob department. He looks like Fischer Stevens (who dated Michelle Pfeiffer, by the way and was idiotic enough to cheat on her - but I digress). The judges encourage a dance-off between them and I fast forward. They devote WAY too much of the show to it. They let David through, which is really unfair to his partner.
Porno gets through and next week, we'll get to see ALL good dancers. YIPPEEEE!!!! 170 dancers are going to Vegas. I am SO looking forward to it.
Who was your favorite? Let us know. Sammy wins my love tonight.
She tries to pick a fight with Tyce because he looked "disgusted" when she was doing her crotch flashes. Hello Wislande - the gay man isn't into your wahoo! Back to the pole with you.
I love Geo from word go. He approaches the judge's table and Mary is so freaked out that she claws Nigel. What, did she think she was getting mugged? I am confused as to how Geo can see with his eye-blocking headdress. Geo will be going to choreography.
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